Troublesome words identified. Thank you, Dr. C. I learned a lot…
My venerable English professor, Dr. C., recently gave me Bryson’s Dictionary of Troublesome Words. It was a gift borne(1) of his lifelong(2), and invariably(3) frustrating, attempts to improve my writing skills since he first taught me as a Freshman(4) in college. Indeed, the general consensus(5) among my professors was that I was never to be mistaken for an academic wonderkind.(6)
A quick perusal of the book made me realize that my writing frequently includes - and miss uses(7) – Mr. Bryson’s troublesome words. The book is comprised of(8) hundreds of examples of words and phrases that clearly drive editors and astute readers to distraction. I cannot help but(9) feel pangs(10) of remorse for the grammatical suffering I may have inflicted on Dr. C. and my gentle readers. This realization leaves me feeling bereft.(11)
Mr. Bryson’s book deals with both(12) redundant phrases, words commonly mispelled,(13) and words that are invariably(14) used incorrectly. After reading through Bryson’s tome, writing seems like a nerve-wracking(15) enterprise replete with a plentitude(16) of opportunities to look ill-educated.
However, since I am a self-confessed(17) word nerd, I will put aside concerns for my fragile writer’s ego. I resolve to studiously review this most unique(18) book so as to(19) advance my literary skills and avoid reverting back(20) to old habits. Irregardless(21) of the challenge, I pledge to try and(22) improve my writing and I am anxious(23) to make meaningful strides in that endeavor.
Not surprisingly, I am loathe(24) to admit the many mistakes in previous writings but its(25) never too late for any one(26) to improve. And even though I know it will be a long road to hoe(27), I am determined to do better. That is my promise to you and Dr. C.
Before I strike out of that long road, however, I need to lay down(28) to take a nap. Writing good(29) is hard work.
—
Link here to see the total of(30) 31 grammatical errors(31) embedded in this affront to proper English.
With sincere apologies to Dr. C.
Lord knows he tried his best.
-BH
Should be “born.” Borne is used for the sense of supporting or tolerating.
“Lifelong” is not accurate. Dr. C was thirty-five years old when we met. A significant portion of his life was blissfully free of my problematic writing.
“Invariably” means fixed, constant, or not subject to change. My writing was bad at times, but not invariably so.
freshman - no need for capitalization
Consensus is, by definition, general. A tautology.
Wunderkind. Even Nate of the hit TV show Ted Lasso learned about this in Season Three.
No need to point out that this error is a misuse of our time.
“Composed of” not “Comprised of” - comprise means to contain and the expression “Comprised of” is always wrong. (Who knew? Not me…)
“Cannot help but” is unnecessarily wordy and a little irregular. Better to simply say “Cannot help…”
Pangs usually refer to sharp, sudden, and brief physical discomfort. This particular remorse is consistent and ongoing - a real pain in my a**.
Bereft is not to lack something, but to be dispossessed of it. I was never dispossessed of the realization in question.
Both should not be used to describe more than two things
Never ever misspell this word
See #3. Still true.
Nerve-racking. Getting this one wrong will be the wrack and ruin of your writing.
Plenty of folks miss this one. The word should be “plenitude.”
Self-confessed? Who else could confess for you? “Confessed” is sufficient.
One thing cannot be more unique than another. Lose the “most.”
The first two words of “so as to” are unnecessary
Revert back is redundant. Where else could you revert? Forward?
Regardless of what you might believe, irregardless is not a word.
One should not write “try and” when trying to sound serious. No “and” please.
Anxious connotes worry or fear, not eagerness or expectation
I loathe the fact that I didn’t use loath properly in this sentence
It’s an homage to my good friend Jean Ross who knows a thing or two about eff’n apostrophes. (And don’t get us started on “a” vs “an” before “homage”. It all depends on how you choose to pronounce the word.)
Anyone knows “any one” is incorrect in this instance
Good luck hoeing that road. Perhaps a row would be a more productive use of your hoe?
George Washington could not lie, but he could lie down.
Well, perhaps I should use the adverb “well” to modify verbs in my writing.
“Total of” is superfluous. Link here to see my 31 grammatical errors.
Can something be simultaneously “grammatical” and an “error?” Writing “31 errors” is more than enough.
